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The power of having confidence!

As we go thru life, there are several factors that affect our self esteem and confidence. And it can change daily, weekly or monthly. But it is a fact that your confidence will be challenged either professionally or personally.
A loss of confidence can be like a malignancy. It can eat at you and do long term damage, if you allow it. Self Esteem and confidence go hand in hand even though there is a difference between the two.

You have to take an approach of feeling in control, when you temporarily feel that someone has taken it away from you.
What are the circumstances that have just taken place, where you feel less about yourself. Where you in a group setting, where you were judged by your piers? Where you in professional environment and someone made a corrective criticism about something you just did?
Seriously the situations can and do go on and on, if we let them.
You MUST take a step back when you feel “threatened.” You must review what has gone on to cause that feeling. Nobody, but nobody wants to feel left out…ever. You didn’t want to be that kid who was chosen last on the line up for teams. Why?…because it simply made you feel unworthy. Like nobody cared. And that is where you have to take some responsibility for the rejection and find where y6ur strength is. Being judged by other people hurts. And nobody likes that.
I have frequently used with my clients a technique that is called Neural Linguistic Programing (N.L.P.) And this exercise has you taking a deep breath, pressing your thumb to the first finger on your hand and repeating the following sentence.
“I choose to be in control, feeling strong and confident is O.K. with me.” Say this sentence 1 finger at a time with conviction. Take your thumb and go thru your right hand then switch over to your left hand and repeat that sentence as you press your thumb to each finger….repeating it AND meaning it.
Talk it over with someone, if you are stressed by what has been done or said to you. JUST DONT IGNORE AND REPRESS IT…or you will continue to lose your confidence.
Trust me, you will continually have your confidence challenged thru out your life! Choose to take control and feel focused and crisply aware of your talents. Choose to live in the present and focus on the power of you. Just that alone can be a might challenge. No one but no one can live your life fully. You have the control and the choice to believe and accept yourself!
Look in the mirror and realize what a blessing you are in so many simple but necessary ways! My book “Who Stole My Confidence? 7 Rock Solid Steps To Take Yours Back!” is the right investment in your life at ANY stage!

Not everyone is going to like you!

You have heard of the 80/20 rule? It is true with everything in life….especially when you make a presentation. Even one that you have prepared for!
Vil Pareto in the 1880’s is credited with this statistic that 80% will like and 20% will dislike….no matter what!
And this statistic can be applied to almost anything in life.
Such as you get along with 80% of the people you work with and 20% you have chosen… not to relate to. This statistic is applicable to many other similar things in life…and I am sure you can understand this.
But, the fact remains that when you make a presentation…someone is surely going to find fault with it. And possibly they will even let you know it. It’s their objective to probably let the people around them to know it, and then THEY might even spread the word of their displeasure.
As a professional trainer, I have experienced this more than once! I knew my material. I presented it with credibility. The majority of people who attended, benefitted from the my course. But disharmony existed, and those scorned people let me know it!
So how do you address this? Because this malignancy can do damage to your presentation, your self belief and your presentation skills.
If possible find out what caused them to feel so disgruntled. Ask how you let them down?
Address it in a professional manner and see how you can rectify it for them. They probably will be complimented by your interest in them, and will be pleased to find out that their concern had impact on you!
Then take it to the next step and rectify it when you make that presentation again.
Trial and error is an ongoing deal whenever you present with frequency. Tweak your speech each time….and fewer people will be going “to the dark side.”
Knowing that not everyone will always like you. Just ask any former presidential candidate.
Eileen Strong is eager to create a powerful results presentations for you and your team today.

Got confidence?

Whatever stage in life you might be at, your confidence can be challenged at anytime.
Whether you are in negotiations for a job, promotion or a pay raise, you will probably question yourself. Possibly you will have second thoughts while it is taking place, or more so, you will question yourself after the event is over with.
It will be inevitable that you will have some slight doubt that you may have said something wrong.
This is natural and this is healthy. Be cautious though. You can be your own worst enemy very easily, in your journey of wanting to see only the best results. The best approach is addressing this issue to rehearse your thoughts and your actions!
Review what questions you would ask, if the roles where reversed?
Seriously play it out in your mind. We tend to “beat ourselves up afterwards”…and we do it quite well. Instead, because you were prepared; because you anticipated potential questions or topics. And because of that, no matter what direction the conversation went….you were comfortable. You had confidence. You felt good.

When you carry that strong belief system with you, there is a presence to you. And other people know it.
It might be subtle…but it is to your advantage.

Yes, confidence takes practice. Feeling good about yourself is a constant journey. And it is up to you to control it. Seriously….it is.
Otherwise, fear will take over. Even in the smallest amounts. And then you begin to question yourself again.
Talk it out loud how you want to sound, how you want to look. Get comfortable with it. Take just a few actions and practice them. Then do it again….and again. At a certain point, it will feel comfortable. But it is up to you take the first small step.
This is an investment in yourself and your future. Make it a worthy one. Believe in you and believe in the positive outcome that YOU can generate.
As a presentations skills coach and a therapist, I can help you make changes within your life. Strong Incentives, truly does offer powerful results!

The power of failure and embarrassment…..

How frequently we only remember what we ‘screwed up on.” We repeat the atrocity in our mind again and again and again. Rarely do we repeat the moments when everything went smoothly. Those events seem to blend and blur into the past.
If we messed up on a sales presentation and lost the sale….we repeat it again and gain more emotional scar tissue. Yet we spend little time, giving ourselves accolades of praise when we got the sale, or the appointment or even the date that we were hoping to take place.
Everyday truly requires us to recognize even the little things that we did….big or small. Simply recognize them and give yourself credit.
Whether you put in a long day of commuting, being productive at work and dragging yourself back home. RECOGNIZE IT!
This was another day of your life, that you did the best you could do. Stop judging, stop ignoring and start recognizing.
We tend to forget the norm.
We forget the beauty of the brevity of one more day of life.
I recently went to see the replica of Henry Thoreau’s cabin at Walden’s pond. And I purchased his book. It was a wise investment. Everyday I read at least two more pages, just to “check in” with the premise that today was well spent. That today was productive, focused and had an awareness of each activity done.
How we frequently we forget this. WHY?
Stop beating yourself up.
Start giving yourself a “TaDa” everyday.
Recognize the uniqueness of you. Don’t be shy on doing it. Appreciate what you did today.
Seriously you might not get a tomorrow.
Don’t focus on the “oops” but focus on the “wow’s” of the simplicity of today.
It was and is YOUR day and no one else’s.
Claim it and enjoy it because it is your life…and no one can live it like you!!
I have been dubbed the “Attitude Amazon” and intend to make that title stick with style. My company name of Strong Incentives…sounds motivational…and I do motivate…your mind and your belief system. You are worth it!