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The Only Thing You Have To Fear Is Fear Itself!

Yes that sentence was said by the late, great Franklin D. Roosevelt at his 1st Inaugural speech.

And we WERE a country was living in fear. We had high unemployment, we had social and government and

international problems that SCARED most of us. Sounds familiar to what is going on today!

The play on words of the acronym F.E.A.R. is “False Expectations Appearing Real”

How often have you been afraid, truly afraid? Probably more than what you realize. But that is good. The experience of fear is what we learn from. And it usually was an important lesson. Whether you failed a test and didn’t get the job. Whether you failed yourself…and didn’t achieve what you were hoping to. Or whether you failed your parents, your child or someone in need.

You WILL remember that failure.

Look at how many people have failed and have given up. And now think of how many people have failed and did not give up! Thomas Edison said that “he never failed….he only learned new ways of how not to try it that way…again.”  Even after he went totally deaf, Mr. Edison would BITE as hard as he could into the phonograph, so that he could FEEL the vibration of the music! Michael Jordan said he had failed his team so many times, that he lost over 36 VERY important games and hundreds of regular games…BUT he never gave up.

You never gave up trying to learn how to ride a bike, or swim or ski or learn any new sport. And if you did….it probably haunted you. And probably still does to this day! It takes discipline, attitude and a strong belief in the most important person in your life…YOU!

In my book “Who Stole My Confidence?” 7 Rock  Solid Steps To Take Yours Back!” I discuss in detail how to pick up the pieces after you felt you had “lost them all”, and didn’t know where to go next. Remember you can lose your confidence in yourself and wallow and allow yourself to feel fearful, uncertain and not know what to do next. AND this can happen to you at any stage in life. But you can adapt.You can pick up the pieces… and you can feel more  confident….one step at a time. At my site StrongIncentives.com you can read and discover how hire me as a speaker and trainer to your teams and incredible employees on how to become more “resilient” and less fearful of what can or could go wrong!

I watched my home team Green Bay Packers take a beating on the opening night of this season….but I know  they will learn from their mistakes and apply it to their next game….and ideally WIN.

So should you! Remember the MOST important person in your life is you, and always will be. Everyone has obstacles and we all handle them differently. Think of Helen Keller, and realize nothing can or should stop you, Close your eyes, and your ears and live in her world for 90 seconds, and realize how lucky  you really are!

Alphabet blocks spell growth

How to speak confidently in public….and actually feel comfortable doing it!

Ugh….I’ve got to speak…and I really, really don’t want to!! I mean seriously, I don’t want to! First off, it is a natural apprehension. Even a professional speaker can be a little on edge.
If you have ever read interviews of established actors….they always mention how apprensive they are…”how many butterflies” they have in their stomach. And actually that is a good thing. It gives you that edge.
But it is when you let your fear control you, and overwhelm you. It’s when the F.E.A.R. takes place  (F.alse E.pectations A.ppearing R.eal).

Because your mind can allow you to feel and stay …”out of control!”
There is NO reason for that to be a dominating factor.
Your confidence is an ongoing growth process. Each opportunity is a new one. You are on an increased learning curve.  And the more that you have the opportunity to speak in front of ANY size audience, the more natural you will feel. But if you avoid it, and stick to only what you feel comfortable with….than you WILL maintain that same fear.

You have only become comfortable at what you do,…. because of doing it over and over again. It becomes 2nd nature to you. Think of how you perform at a job, or at a sport that you like. You simply just do it!

Like that NIke commercial tag line goes….”Just Do It!”

If you don’t maintain that attitude…the fear will continue to fester and control you. There is a great song sung incredibly well by Patti LaPone…..”I’ve got a new atttiude.”
Maybe that is a song you might crank up prior to giving a speech….or find a song that does it for you…one that motivates and excites YOU! It is the music that gets you moving….maybe one that you use on a treadmill, to “psych” you up and keep you moving. Hearing that music might be all you need to be the catalyst to get you there and present with energy!
Believe it or not, it can be something as simple as that. Think of how many times you have heard a certain piece of music, and you are compelled to “crank it up loud.”

Finally, write down the fear that is controlling you. Are you afraid you will not be welcomed, liked, accepted…. or will you be boring? By writing it down you recognize the issue at hand. This action helps you to actually control your fear. “You got to name it to claim it” is actually quite true.
I have been involved in clinical Hypnosis for over 25 years now, (PowerfulResultsHypnosis) and am amazed to this day, how powerful the mind is! I have seen clients make drastic differences…just thru visualizing how they knew they could and WOULD look.

So Can You!!!
By listening to a reinforced message that is repeated in a safe, and positive reinforced way…you CAN eliminate those public speaking fears.
Contact me, (Eileen@StrongIncentives.com) to have a customized CD made for you…if you have a major presentation coming up. It truly is within your mind to take control of this fear.
Discover how to speak and love it.

You can do it…in fact…you can choose to….”Just Do It!”

Not everyone is going to like you!

You have heard of the 80/20 rule? It is true with everything in life….especially when you make a presentation. Even one that you have prepared for!
Vil Pareto in the 1880’s is credited with this statistic that 80% will like and 20% will dislike….no matter what!
And this statistic can be applied to almost anything in life.
Such as you get along with 80% of the people you work with and 20% you have chosen… not to relate to. This statistic is applicable to many other similar things in life…and I am sure you can understand this.
But, the fact remains that when you make a presentation…someone is surely going to find fault with it. And possibly they will even let you know it. It’s their objective to probably let the people around them to know it, and then THEY might even spread the word of their displeasure.
As a professional trainer, I have experienced this more than once! I knew my material. I presented it with credibility. The majority of people who attended, benefitted from the my course. But disharmony existed, and those scorned people let me know it!
So how do you address this? Because this malignancy can do damage to your presentation, your self belief and your presentation skills.
If possible find out what caused them to feel so disgruntled. Ask how you let them down?
Address it in a professional manner and see how you can rectify it for them. They probably will be complimented by your interest in them, and will be pleased to find out that their concern had impact on you!
Then take it to the next step and rectify it when you make that presentation again.
Trial and error is an ongoing deal whenever you present with frequency. Tweak your speech each time….and fewer people will be going “to the dark side.”
Knowing that not everyone will always like you. Just ask any former presidential candidate.
Eileen Strong is eager to create a powerful results presentations for you and your team today.

Got F.E.A.R?

Have you heard “the only thing you have to fear, is fear itself?” Well lets break this apart.
This acronym stands for F.alse E.xpectations A.ppearing R.eal.
And that is what happens when we are not sure of our own level of confidence or self doubt… when it comes to a presentation. Taking control of the situation is critically important.

As the talented Alan Weiss says….”The first sale is to yourself”….and then after that “one should always think with the 4th sale in mind.”
We tend to let this fear….and the expectations that we will screw up on all the problems that may surface; or if our nerves “win out” and a poor or simply lackluster presentation takes place. Now that would bite!
Realize that this fear is simply festering in YOUE thoughts. And the fear is growing as soon as you think of the upcoming presentation.
Take control of your situation, your belief systems and ACCEPT that your knowledge is valid. Also that you will share your wisdom, in such a way that people will recognize it…and make positive comments on it.
You practiced, and practiced, and you knew your material. You minimized and rid yourself of this f.e.a.r. and you made your presentation rock!
Dr. Milton Erickson addressed these fears and had all of his clients practice a mopdified form of N.L.P. called Neural LInguistic Programing. This technique, which requires you to repeat a positive phrased sentence and then reinforces that belief. If you do not honor that strategy you will let your fear win.
And your NOT worth that happening.

Eileen Strong is your expert in presentation skills.

Got confidence?

Whatever stage in life you might be at, your confidence can be challenged at anytime.
Whether you are in negotiations for a job, promotion or a pay raise, you will probably question yourself. Possibly you will have second thoughts while it is taking place, or more so, you will question yourself after the event is over with.
It will be inevitable that you will have some slight doubt that you may have said something wrong.
This is natural and this is healthy. Be cautious though. You can be your own worst enemy very easily, in your journey of wanting to see only the best results. The best approach is addressing this issue to rehearse your thoughts and your actions!
Review what questions you would ask, if the roles where reversed?
Seriously play it out in your mind. We tend to “beat ourselves up afterwards”…and we do it quite well. Instead, because you were prepared; because you anticipated potential questions or topics. And because of that, no matter what direction the conversation went….you were comfortable. You had confidence. You felt good.

When you carry that strong belief system with you, there is a presence to you. And other people know it.
It might be subtle…but it is to your advantage.

Yes, confidence takes practice. Feeling good about yourself is a constant journey. And it is up to you to control it. Seriously….it is.
Otherwise, fear will take over. Even in the smallest amounts. And then you begin to question yourself again.
Talk it out loud how you want to sound, how you want to look. Get comfortable with it. Take just a few actions and practice them. Then do it again….and again. At a certain point, it will feel comfortable. But it is up to you take the first small step.
This is an investment in yourself and your future. Make it a worthy one. Believe in you and believe in the positive outcome that YOU can generate.
As a presentations skills coach and a therapist, I can help you make changes within your life. Strong Incentives, truly does offer powerful results!